Will the rectum monitor keep track of the duration of my nocturnal erections? I need to find out if I can hit 179 minutes to flex on 18-year olds.

I seriously wonder, do any of the folks with the “AR glasses to assist repair” thing ever actually repair anything, or do they get their ideas of how you repair stuff from computer games?

Futurism articles really make me feel how these people are not living in the same reality as I.

Looking from now into 2149 and war is a nonfactor in Baby’s life. “Genocide” isn’t mentioned once, or “fascism”, or “borders”. No food or water scarcity. No mention of what happens to insects or wildlife or people in island countries or near the Equator. The only mention of “ecosystem” is in the expression “Center for Advanced Computer-Human Ecosystems”. The only mention of “climate change” is to say that it will lead us to a “reconfigurable architectural robotic space”. Somehow people have all the energy in the world to power AI girlfriends and moveable robotic walls and menstruation-sensing tech panties. The human body, the animal that is the human being, doesn’t really matter in this world where Microsoft VR smells your anxiety in your deathbed and comforts you with self-warming textiles. Where does the food that sustains the flesh comes from, what is our relationship to the plants and animals and insects and bacteria who we depend on for food and air and shelter, who builds all this stuff and under which conditions—considerations that do not even cross the mind of this person when they think of the question: “What does the future hold for those born today?”

The future as predicted by people who are completely addicted to computers.

Yes officer this smart device idea right here:

If the baby has trouble latching, maybe the sticker’s capacitive touch sensors could help the parent find a better position.

Ok don’t know why the AI companies are courting the hacked found footage toilet voyeur market but here we are, I guess

Found on metafilter, along with this excellent comment:

Learning will be increasingly self-­directed, says Liz Gerber, co-director of the Center for Human-Computer Interaction and Design at Northwestern University. The future classroom is “going to be hyper-­personalized.” AI tutors could help with one-on-one instruction or repetitive sports drills.

No it won’t. Learning has been going to be “increasingly self-directed” since before I was born, but it turns out, in fact, that you need to have a certain amount of maturity and focus before “self-directed” means anything more than “goofing off as much as possible” or possibly, just possibly, “intense focus only on those things that interest me intensely”. What will happen is that the children of the poor and the less-involved middle class will have shitty digital “tutors” in chaotic classrooms or goof off in isolation while the children of the rich are taught the old-fashioned way, by talented individual humans with only such technology as supports focused, human-centered learning. “Learning will be increasingly self-directed” will be used as a justification for treating everyone but the rich badly.

Furthermore, if people do have digital spy tutors looking over their shoulders, they will either be janky and kids will devote a lot of time to fooling them or they’ll be creepy surveillance that will fuck the kids up, or probably both. At best, these will be simulations of people and kids will learn to have “relationships” with fake people that don’t exist, don’t think or judge and do not love them, and IT optimists will somehow spin this as great and helpful. (I suppose there is some possibility that we will create and enslave actual conscious AI, which will be a nightmare in its own way).