Thats not fair at all, you ever see a dude wanting to fight and you tell him to calm down. I think telling pissed people to cool out just fires them up.
Tell them to get angrier and short circuit them instead.
Get mad about it idiot
Bonus points if you’re completely uninvolved and just walking past an argument.
I wonder if that would work, like you just start getting mad at them for how half hearted they are about the whole thing. Start saying ‘if you are only going to be 10% tough about this shit you should just sit down’
I mean, I’d get madder, but anything but “I’m sorry” or “fuck you this is (and actually is) your fault jackass” is going to make me madder.
“Pop off, motherfucker, I DARE you!”
*POW*
I keep waiting for one of these drama scenes where someone grabs another dude’s gun and points it at their head to end with the guy saying “okay” and pulling the trigger.
Does anyone want to hear my far cry 3 headcanon that the gun in the beginning was unloaded and vaas was just going to recruit whoever pulls the trigger?
No? Well too bad you already read it. It really sounds like something he’d do to me.
ALWAYS. A. RELEVANT. XKCD!!!
Yeah, the only way that I’ve found really works is to use “I” statements.
Aiaiai, you need to calm down!
Yeah, I feel like there’s rarely a “calm down” window for the men that need to hear it. There’s calm, then there’s hurting themselves by breaking things or hurting other people. “You need to calm the fuck down!” is likely to work, whereas “You need to calm down” will only make things work.
Insecurities fuelled by testosterone. Where fisty cuffing anything appears to be a positive step toward sound resolution.
I think you are right I think a lot of men just have a snapping line, where they will bottle it all up till they pop and if they would have just not bottled they could have been spun down a bit.
“We’re gonna be like three little Fonzies here. And what’s Fonzie like?”
For some reason big guys LOVE telling little guys to calm down – even if they’re not really mad 😡 .
you know I think its all the knight bullshit a lot of males feel. Like hey man calm down this shit isnt worth it, but at the same time its only the bigger then you guys that will say it as the ones the same size are like man I dont wanna get punched or become the focus. But this is just a hot take on the idea.
The physical inequality, just like OP’s example, always makes it more egregious.
My experience is that all upset people love to be told to calm down. 😉
TIL I am a woman
Happy Pride. Or Wrath as the case may be.
Happy pride! Don’t know what wraith is, but it sounds bad ass so thanks for that roo!
misspelling. I meant Wrath.
I’m not the smartest man, and i so don’t know what you mean, help a sister out?
Pride is one of the Seven Deadly Sins. So is Wrath.
“relax” is one of the banned words I cannot use with my wife. If she was shouting about something and I said the word “relax”, it would start a fight probably leading to divorce
That sounds kind of abusive, ngl
Yeah it sounds like someone need to calm down about being told to calm down honestly.
It’s usually the person who’s screwing you over in the first place who tells you to calm down about it.
instead of “calm down” why not say “learn better coping techniques to handle my gaslighting, because it annoys me”
Thanks I’ll try this!
Oh and “calm your tits” is a phrase only to be used when someone involuntarily starts lactating
when my cat is being a little too impatient while I’m givong her her dinner, I tell her to calm all six of her tits. hasn’t worked once but I find it funny.
The most incendiary 2-word phrase in the English language. Said by anyone to anyone.
It’s belittling and aggressive and dismissive and infuriating all at once.
Even saying something as similar as “get a grip!” has a much better chance of success.
calm down, it’s not that incendiary.
Found worse by accident. “Chill”. Just, nothing more.
I really have to keep watvh on myself to not use it…it was my default…
Personally I would still prefer to hear chill, maybe you stumbled on that person’s trigger. Or perhaps it’s an age thing. I associate it with peers, but maybe for them it’s parents.
How bout you chill and calm down?
Would work on me. Trained myself as a teen to not rely on emotions at all. Trauma aside, I do actually step back and rethink if hit with these.
Which really didn’t help notice how irritating “chill” is xD
Sometimes people do need to calm down though
So use any one of the multitudinous other phrases available in English to actually HELP them become calmer or less agitated. Respond to the facts of the individual situation instead. “He’s not worth it.” “You’re better than this/you have been doing so much better, don’t let this set you back.” “You’re in a bad trip man, gonna have to ride it out as easy as you can.” “Chill, dude.” “Take a deep breath.” (This may be followed by one loud long scream, but that’s cathartic and may be followed by rational behavior)
Nobody, no matter how much they need to get control over their emotions and behavior, needs to “calm down”.
I’ve found that “you’re embarrassing yourself” usually produces results with a large magnitude and a highly variable direction
I’ve said “nobody wants to hear your bullshit” which also tends to have a very large effect. Which way the effect swings is completely unknowable but the dynamic will be very different after haha
You need to relax…
You are getting sleeeeepy…
the suns getting real low
That’s a good one!
Edit: Maybe the Avengers could have gotten Big Hulk going for them if they’d told Banner to calm down!
… don’t do it.
It’s funny how upset some get over the phrase when in fact they really do need to calm down. You need to use some roundabout term for it, “chill”, even though it means the same thing.
Interesting thing
I AM CALM!!
He said like Dumbledore
Listen to the woman John!
Calm down! Just calm down!
I think Abraham Lincoln’s head just did that.
Women: We’re not controlled by our wmotions!!!
Also women: I’m on my period that’s why I’m so angry!!!
The only person I’ve had this reaction from was a genx man yelling that he wasn’t being emotional but instead logical. Said man did the standard co.plain about wife and say women are emotional, and also argued that animal abuse shouldn’t be punishable by law because animals don’t have souls.
Don’t see how this equates to animals but I’m just a guy that grew up with 4 women in the house who were given everything they wanted and still complained while I got the bare minimum and wasn’t allowed to show any emotion.
Normally I’d just say this is a me issue due to my upbringing but all my life experience shows the same thing over and over. Women are allowed to be over emotional whenever they want and it’s accepted. A guy gets over emotional once and he’s labeled a problem for the rest of his life.
Calm down boss, you sound like you need to smile more often.
Emotionally mature women do calm down. It just depends on the level of trust she has in what you say.
If you are known to her as someone she trusts and listens to, then she will consider if you are right and start to calm down if she thinks you are.
But it depends a bit on age and maturity and life experiences and all sorts of things.
