• PunnyName@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Don’t buy a ring for engagement unless you know for sure that they a) want an engagement ring, and b) are 100% gonna say yes.

    Marriage shouldn’t be a surprise.

    • FlihpFlorp@lemm.ee
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      21 hours ago

      Me and my my girlfriend are of the mind where (once our relationship is that far) there’s gonna be a long talk about marriage, like if we’re ready, what changes are being made once that happens, a lot of discussion. We also agree once that discussion has been settled there can still be the romantic gesture of popping the question

      I just never understood how people are able to go

      “I’m putting you on the spot would you make a life changing decision that will alter both our lives or will you break my heart, go ahead infront of all these people”

      • Miles O'Brien@startrek.website
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        1 day ago

        Neither the question nor the answer should ever be a surprise.

        The time, and location of proposal are the surprise.

        When I asked my now wife, I knew for sure she was going to say yes, and I knew she would want a simple ring with her birth stone instead of a diamond.

        She had no idea I was going to ask her in the manner I did while we were out camping. that was the surprise for her. Not the question itself.

        • Waraugh@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          20 hours ago

          The engagement can be a surprise didn’t read any differently to me than what you laid out. The only surprise for my wife was that I got her dad’s blessing since that was important to her and when/how I went about it. Was in our home, I’m not someone that feels anyone else needs to be involved. To me our engagement was still a surprise but she had already participated in ring shopping with me and we had obviously discussed thoroughly before hand.

      • Maggoty@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        Nope. If the question was a surprise then your communication skills as a couple aren’t there yet.

        • NABDad@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          The timing can be a surprise, but if you don’t know the answer, don’t ask the question.

      • PhlubbaDubba@lemm.ee
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        24 hours ago

        The moment it becomes official is the surprise, ths actual context of it cannot ever be one.

      • PunnyName@lemmy.world
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        21 hours ago

        Engagement is the initiation of marriage, they are the same. So your sentence doesn’t make sense