cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/31764672

I start with a couple: knitting and crocheting. They are two of the two most useful things I’ve learned so far, all thanks to my grandmother and one of my aunts. Creating bags to carry things, repairing pants, jackets and backpacks, creating little cushions for my lower back or to support my wrist when I’m in the office, etc.

I still remember with some humor how my grandmother insisted to me that, as a man, I should not be ashamed of knowing how to crochet.

Oddly enough, my sister is the one who doesn’t know how to do either those things lol

  • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
    5·
    3 days ago

    I dunno, I’ve kinda lost track of what is and isn’t gender expected in terms of “mandatory” skills, and when it comes to hobbies, there’s only a few that I’ve ever thought of as being outside of traditional options.

    But, yeah, like the example given, I’ve always been able to sew to some degree or another. My hands don’t let me hand sew big projects any more, but still know how to.

    I’m also okay with decorative needlework like cross stitching, and embroidery. Cross stitch was absolutely a gender norm for women on my mom’s side of my family, but some boys of my generation picked it up. Embroidery, I picked up in art classes in jr high school and just enjoyed enough to keep at it.

    Crochet and knitting were also a women’s craft/hobby on that side, and I tried my hand at both. Didn’t like knitting much, but crochet was a nice thing. Kinda stopped fucking with it after I moved out on my own though. Not much use for it, so it was pure hobby and I had other things I’d prefer spending money on.

    On my dad’s side, sewing was about women’s work, but everyone knew enough to patch up a torn shirt or replace a button. My grandmother was a quilter and prone to making her own clothes. I learned a little of both from her.

    Both grandmothers were good with a sewing machine, as was my mom. We had a machine when I was growing up, and my mom would make clothes. So I was fairly freely able to experiment with one. Never really got into it, but I can still turn out wearable items, as long as you don’t expect high fashion or expert stitching. Like, my hems are crooked as a politician, but the clothes will fit okay enough.

    Truth be told, my mom’s side of the family didn’t really care about gendered interest limits. Us kids were always allowed to at least try things out, and were expected to help with any tasks on demand. My sister can do some basic woodworking. One of my cousins played american football in high school, the only girl in her state at the time. All of the women except my grandmother can/could change tires and oil. And all of the boys can handle normal housework and cooking, and some of us played with dolls and such.

    There weren’t any hard lines drawn. Yeah, our grandparents stayed along pretty traditional lines, but they would teach any of us what we were interested in, plus helped make sure we could all handle basic necessities. The only real limitations were that most of the adults had similar interests, so we could only pick things up they knew about. You wanted to learn outdoorsy stuff, you could get a dozen people teaching you. You wanted to learn about repairing electronics, good luck unless it was old electronics (my grandfather did some of that in the Navy before he became an officer, but that way in the sixties lol).

    But, yeah, I’m always amazed when guys can’t even sew a button on their shirt. I carry a small sewing kit with me in my day bag, and an even smaller kit in my pocket organizer. Like, it’s a life skill, you need to know this shit, it isn’t just for women.

    What’s really funny in that regard is a guy I used to know. He’d crack jokes about my sewing kit, but dude worked with leather. And he’d sew leather as part of that. But he would say, “yeah, but it’s leather. That’s for men. Cloth is for women, dude.”